I remember hearing this once, and it stuck me a being incredibly profound and at the time incredibly humbling and kind. It was in relation to a work colleague, talking about another work colleague, who had lost their son via suicide. His comment was 'it could of happened to any one of us, any one of our children could have taken the same steps.... but for the Grace of God".

I have remembered this, and have used it on many occasion, quietly to myself. Although it stirs up a slight sense of guilt ("Thank God it is not me"), it also rouses an incredible sense of gratitude. How fortunate am I, to not be going through what this person is experiencing? How fortunate that I have shelter, a warm bed, a loving family? How fortunate am I that I have not experienced what this person is going through.

Are you particularly hard on yourself?

Are you always striving to achieve?

Do you hate failing?

Are you trying so hard all the time?

Are you tired - but continue to push through?

Do you work twice as hard at the gym (or elsewhere) because you feel you have to?

Are you constantly trying to prove to yourself or others your worth?

I have had a number of clients who have come to me after feeling that they haven’t made much progress in long-term therapy.

They come to me to try a different approach.

They have worked through a lot of their psychological issues and may have made some progress - but they still feel there is something holding them back.

I’ve heard on several occasions of people who have had months or years of psychological input who - once they try a different approach - find their mood finally lifts. For example, a young male who had over 12 months of psychological therapy added some omega 3 into his regime and within a couple of weeks noticed that he felt less irritable, less aggressive and calmer.

Self-care is essential for both mental and physical health. Self-care is "the practice of taking action to preserve or improve one's own health” and “the practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress” (Oxford).

There appears to be some misconception that self-care is something of a luxury, an indulgence or ‘selfish’. However self-care (caring for oneself) is a necessary part of staying well. It involves basic things such as choosing the right food to eat, engaging in exercise, nurturing relationships, committing to forming good habits and paying your taxes on time, as well as sleeping in, getting a massage, speaking up or walking out.

The issue comes from what people interpret as self-care

Yesterday was world mental health day. The theme of this years mental health day was ‘suicide prevention’.

I struggle with this concept. Suicide prevention? What about preventing people from becoming depressed in the first place?

Depression isn’t simply ‘feeling sad’, or having issues coping with a loss - ie a normal part of grieving. Depression often comes on with no discerning reason, to those who on the outside appear to ‘have it all’. It’s complex, complicated and confusing.

Recent statistics report that our suicide rates continue to climb. Psychiatric hospitals are bursting at the seams, mental health hospitals are understaffed and staff are overwhelmed. It’s difficult unless you are in the most urgent need of care to get psychiatric help. The burden is often left to families to cope with the struggling person - if the struggling person is lucky enough to have a family member to support them.

It’s all a little depressing (no pun intended). So what’s so wrong with what we are doing? And how do we do it better?

I recently gave myself a little Instagram challenge - “100 ways in 100 days of Self-Care”. I set myself the task of really getting into ‘What is Self-Care?’ Because self-care is often thought of a bubble-bath, a massage or a date night - fantastic short term relaxation or time out.

However, sometimes self-care is a big plate of vegetables and a good hard walk.

The challenge in our life is

This week is Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW). Although we may not suffer from mental illness directly - we all have days and times in our life where we are in excellent mental health and well-being and times that - well - we are not. Mental health is on a continuum - at the one side there is mental illness - and at the other side - mental well-being. There is an awful lot of goings on in between.

Sometimes the ‘not so good’ end of the scale can last for a significant amount of time. And although we may not be officially diagnosed as being depressed or anxious - we can get into a bit of a rut - and struggle to find our way out. This may be due to